people might mistaken me as a blogger whos paid to blog. its like the fourth post of the day? nvm, this one will be short. but not sweet.

WHATEVER YOU SAID ROBBED ME OF MY SMILE.

nevertheless, i'll brush it aside. no reason to get upset over it, do i? and please dont ask me any questions. its just a random thought. case closed. CHEERS!

hey dearest. youd better be honoured. this whole post is just for you. hahaha. firstly, i wanna apologise. for not being able to give you a good reason why i dont wanna meet. but please believe me when i say i really want to. BUT. yes, theres a but. and i dont know what it is. and dont get me wrong, i really miss you a lot. probably more than you think i do. -pauses for you to fly-

secondly, i wanna apologise for being a brat. seems like youre right. i am not easy. well baby, i never said i was in the first place :D i meant it when i said i really admire the way youre so sincere about wanting to meet, i admire your determination and your patience, i admire the way you can put up with my nonsense. i really do. its no easy feat you know? so yeah, congratulate yourself. hahaha. and i gotta say im really touched by your sincerity and perserverance. i must be one of the luckiest bitches around. LOVE!

youre on your way home now, and its all your FAULT that i cant text all these corny stuffs to you. now i have to post it online for the whole world to see. but its what i wanna tell you and im afraid if i waited till you reached home, i would have forgotten most of it. its not because im old okay. dont snigger. well, my mind's kinda occupied by someone. so theres a high risk of me forgetting. :D -pauses for you to grin-
so yeah, my point is to express my gratitude, [and omg you just signed in all of a sudden and im talking to you and youd better not see this anytime soon otherwise i'll just die] and also to let the whole world know how fortunate i am. YAY!

okay, this is sucha composition. i didnt realise i could be THAT corny.

'Nothing is more difficult, and therefore more precious, than to be able to decide.'

its a quote by Napoleon Bonaparte. its pretty true isnt it? its definitely one of the hardest things to do. at least, for me. often, we procrastinate and put off the decision-making for as long as we can. it seems like most of us dread it. i wonder if its the fear of making the wrong decision. perhaps it is. because making the wrong decisions would often lead to another thing that is peoples' common enemy- regrets.

regrets are inevitable in life. i mean, if youre human, ure bound to make errors and thus regret. but i guess the most important thing is to learn how to move on. sometimes its hard. cos that wrong choice could change your life completely. especially when some decisions are irreversible. most of the time, we take forever to decide on something and when we finally do, we realise perhaps its the wrong choice after all. i am no exception.

for me, making decisions has always been one of the toughest challenges. i tend to worry a lot about what would happen after i have made a choice. but i guess it would make things a lot easier if i were to learn how to accept things, yes even if ive made the wrong decision. so what? it could be a blessing in disguise, it could turn out well in the long run. i mean, you dont really know right?

but sometimes this fear gets out of hand and i will choose to run away from making a decision. i realised how silly i am because avoiding is not a solution. someday the problem will resurface and i would be faced with another, perhaps tougher decision. so yeah, why not just follow your heart and live with whatever that is to come. it wont be that bad im sure.

i guess thats why Napoleon Bonaparte says its precious. its not something that everyone can handle. i believe there are only a handful of people who are strong enough to live a life without regrets. they accept whatever that happens to them and often try to maintain a positive outlook of things. these are the people i truly admire because they can do something that i cant do. and that is to be able to make decisions, be sure about it and live with no regrets. but sadly, its a skill that you have to acquire by your own means. no help rendered.

opinions anyone?

i decided t dedicate this t my trusty phone. it has been w me for like what? two years? or maybe one. although its a dinosaur, i still love it alot. so fuck those 3G phones, those w some hundred megapixel cam or whatever to-die-for feature. dinosaur phones are the best. muahahah.

01) What is your phone brand?
+ nokia.

02) What's the last 3 digits of your mobile
number?:
+ 480.

03) What does the 2nd message in your inbox
say?:
+ 'working lor. how to rest'

04) Who's the first person who comes up under
the letter M?:
+ madeline.

05) Who's the last person you rang?:
+ missed call- baby, answered call- darl.

06) Who was your last missed call from?
+ baby.

07) Who's the 2nd person who comes up
under D?:
+ darren.

08) What does the last message in your
inbox say?:
+ a three-page long message w a repetition of i love yous.

Who's the 3rd person who comes up under J?:
+ jme's home.

10) Go to your Sent Items - what does the 5th
message say?:
+ 'try t call her and explain things t her. you shouldn keep guessing bout what shes thinking. just call and find out.' p.s i was trying t be Dr. Love (;

11) Who's the 4th person who comes up
under S?:
+ sandy pek.

12) Who's your network provider?:
+ uh, M1?

13) How many messages are currently in your
inbox?:
+ 110.

14) What do you have as your
background:
+ its hard t describe.

15) Who's the 2nd person who comes up
under R?:
+ TFF's dad.

16) Who do you have on speed dial 3?:
+ dad.

17) If you're on Pay as you Go, how much credit
do you have?
+

18) Who's the first person who comes up
under C?:
+ hubby!

19) How many bars of signal do you
currently have?
+ full.

20) What do you have as your main
ringtone.
+ hahaha, i dont even know. its always been vibration or light.

so many things to do, so little time. how fucking true. sometimes i wish the world would come to a standstill.


i wish i could tape the teachers' mouths for a day. honestly, nagging is a good thing. but too much of it can drive one nuts. yes, we KNOW its OUR year. we KNOW its either a make it or break it situation. must you remind us? go find a dick to occupy your mouths. im gonna bite all of you if you people dont shut up.

FRIENDS. define that for me please. i wish i didnt have such thoughts. i really wish i didnt. but i cant help it. youre impossible. FUCK YOU.


and im really sorry to you, for making you worry. but youre pretty easy to pacify. thats a bad thing you know. i love challenges. hahaha

tomorrow is gonna be an irritating day. i just know it. every school day is an irritating day. oh, and that irritant caught me during the hair check today. -pauses for effect- she caught me for my fringe. yes, youre right. i almost died of a heart attack. did i mention that she was an irritant?

oh! and i just realised. my forte sooo doesnt lie in drawing. thats a sad thing. but its a good way of entertaining myself. cos i'll always end up laughing at whatever ive attempted to draw. trust me, when i say i cant draw, i really cant draw.

anyone knows where to buy a bloody wig?

i need one. because my fucking hair was butchered by michael.

YES, GO AHEAD AND LAUGH. im gonna wear a paper bag to school tomorrow.

for now im gonna overdose myself w panadols and go to bed. hopefully i'll wake up and find that my hair has grown back. HAHAHAHA. and im never gonna step into another salon. at least not any time soon.

meaningful day spent w three important people. lots of laughter and smiles. i guess it did help me t take my mind off my back-to-school blues for awhile. i was fatigued and had to rely on red bulls t keep me sane. tsk, im ashamed of myself.

today also helped me t realise that im a lucky bitch cos im surrounded by some very wonderful people. LOVE!

i can be a pain in the neck sometimes. (everytime?) and i guess there's only a handful of people who can tolerate my nonsense. most would probably start plotting gruesome methods of murdering me after listening to me for ten minutes. HAHAHA.

surprisingly, i feel better after talking t you. and im glad. i mean, what the fuck? if your other half cant help, he/she wouldnt be considered as 'the other half' right? it would be pretty disappointing if you had the same effect on me as the others would. after all youre supposed to be special. im pretty curious. i wanna know how much of me can you take. but for now, youre doing great. LOVE! :D

trust me, im a total nut when im moodswinging. you gotta need a hell lot of patience. but i seldom moodswing la! normally i try t be as angelic as possible. HAHAHA. YYEEAA RRIIGGHHTT :D

im making myself smile. hahaha.

spent the past few days hanging out till late, basically just enjoying my freedom while it lasted. had a price to pay though. i feel horribly sick now. dizzy spells, headaches, bodyaches, sore throat etc. what GREAT timing! i guess its just the back-to-school blues. being in a ballroom w its aircons at full blast after walking in the rain is NOT fun at all. i almost died.

spent quality time w my darlings and my babies over the past few days. i just wished i could have spent time w you too. oh well, someday i guess.

i feel guilty for teaching my darlings t appreciate sticks. i feel fucking guilty.

dont talk t me about homework. i swear i'l scream, right at your face. seriously, what do i go to school for? its not like those fucking lessons are useful t me. sometimes i wish i was rich. like this, i dont have to fucking swallow the textbooks and come back home half-dead everyday all for the sake of getting a piece of paper. i would travel t some place far from here, hook up w a rich, foreign guy and become a tai tai. but then again, such stuffs only happen in dreams dont they?

and i need to air my views on people who choose to give their first sexual experience to a stranger instead of someone they know. but THAT. will have t wait. im not in the mood. im sick, remember?

fuck school, good night.

shopping today was good.
"you can make decisions for others but you cant seem to make decisions for yourself" , Baby- 21stJune 06'
guess shes right. i took forever to decide between brown and teal.



im a little disappointed.



argentina vs holland. people, please watch. thats what id call real soccer.

WHEN i RUN AWAY FROM YOU
- FOLLOW ME


WHEN i POUT MY LiPS
- KiSS ME


WHEN i KiCK
- HUG ME TiGHT


WHEN i CALL YOU CRAZY
- iM CRAZY ABOUT YOU


WHEN i AM SiLENT
- iM THiNKiNG OF HOW TO SAY i LOVE YOU


WHEN i iGNORE YOU
- i WANT ALL YOUR ATTENTiON


WHEN i PULL AWAY
- GRAB ME BY THE WAiST & TELL ME YOU'LL
NEVER LET ME GO


WHEN YOU SEE ME AT MY WORST
- TELL ME iM BEAUTiFUL


WHEN i SCREAM AT YOU
- TELL ME YOU LOVE ME


WHEN YOU SEE ME WALKiNG
- SNEAK UP BEHiND ME, & HUG ME


iF I DONT CALL YOU
- iM WAiTiNG BY THE PHONE FOR YOUR CALL


WHEN i SAY "i DONT CARE"
-i DO CARE


WHEN iM SCARED
- HOLD ME BY THE WAiST


WHEN i LOOK LiKE SOMETHiNGS THE MATTER
- KiSS ME & TELL ME EVERYTHiNG WiLL BE
ALRiGHT


WHiLE i HOLD YOUR HANDS
- PLAY WiTH MY FiNGERS


i love stuffs like these. they really help one to learn.

i love gg out of the country. cos when ure back you feel damn patriotic. yes, like all of a sudden. esp when you go to malaysia and when ure gg through s'pore customs you can see the oh-so cute gurkhas. theyre freakin hot.

enjoyed myself while i was away. but i missed you, alot. i knew youd want me to enjoy myself though. dont worry, i did. gonna meet baby later to pass her some stuffs. for now i think im gonna sleep. i think im falling sick.

actually im not-so happy when i think of school. fuck. i have eleven socialstudies structured essays to do. YES LAUGH. oh and one history structured essay. and its on FREAKIN RUSSIA. dont know shit about it. oh and theres a eng compre. and a ton of add.math SOMEBODY JUST KILL ME PLEASE. and i gotta find time to meet up with darlings, baby, clique, mel, you. wow. good night. HAHAHA. thats sudden, i know.

baby ure gone. and nth can replace you. ever. my heart will always have a place for you love. thanks for bringing joy to my life. youre def one in a million. baby, I LOVE YOU. THEN, NOW AND FOREVER.

in loving memory
skunk joshua attenborough a.k.a bitbit.
rest in peace love.

1. Tell her she is beautiful

2. Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if its
just
for a second.

3. Hug her from behind

4. Leave her voice messages to wake up to.

5. Wrestle with her

6. don't go hang out with you ex when shes not
with you, you might not relize how badly it hurts
her.

7. If youre talking to another girl, when you're
done talking, walk over and hug her and kiss
her....let her know she's yours and they aren't.

8. Write her notes or call her just to say "hi"

9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your
girlfriend.

10. Play with her hair.

11. Pick her up (she loves it)

12. Get upset if another guy/girl touches her and she
doesn't like it

13. Make her laugh

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms.

15. If she's mad at you, kiss her.

16. If you care about her, then TELL HER

17. Every guy/girl should give their girl 3 things: a
stuffed animal(she'll hug it every time she goes
to
sleep), jewelry (she'll treasure it forever), and one
of
his t-shirts (she'll most likely wear it to bed) or
sweatshirts sprayed with his cologne!! and
flowers
or something occasionally.

18. Treat her the same around your friends as
you do when you're alone.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile.

20. Hang out with her on weekends

21.Kiss her in the rain (girls love this)

22.Kiss her just for the heck of it

23. If your listening to music, let her listen too.

24. Remember her birthday and get her
something, even if its simple and inexpensive, it came from
YOU. it means all the world to HER.


25. when she gives you a present on your
birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it
and tell her you love it, even if you don't (it'll make
her happy.)

26. Always call her when you say you will, it may
not seem like it, but it does hurt her and makes
her think you don't care so call even if you can only
talk for a minute. Girls don't necessarily have to
have hour long conversations every night but its
nice for us to hear your voice even for a quick
hello.

27. Give her what she wants

28. Recognize the small things . . . they usually
mean the most.

29.dont hug her friends or your friends that are
girls cause she'll feel left out.

30.hang out with her whenever you are free and
u should be free to hang with your girl friend all the
time

31.If u care about her...SHOW her!


guys and girls, please LEARN.

a couple of msgs plus fiftymins of you equals a happy me. YAY. im happy im happy i dont think i can fall asleep tonight. hahaha. from now on, im gonna stop bringing all my problems here. cos i should know better. you wouldnt make me sad, would you? so yep i shall stop being silly and thinking that its the end of the world. IM HAPPY! :D

"well you and X have me and Y. we're not like them. here comes the corny\mushy part...we'll never hurt you guys and we'll protect you guys from all the bitches and bastards.seriously, we just wanna see you two happy" 28/04/06 10:14:36pm

miss complicated, IVE GOT YOU, AND ITS MORE THAN I CAN EVER ASK FOR. THE LEAST I CAN DO IS TO TELL YOU I'L PROTECT YOU TOO.

im in loveeee wooohooo. -.-
yay, my blog's a happy blog :D

its amazing how a 9min 6sec phone call can make me so happy. i guess its not the call. its the caller. sigh. can i stay like this forever? shut up. nothing lasts forever. (:

im starting to believe that humans can go without food after all. its a nice feeling. you feel light. but you feel weak. and all you feel like doing is lay in bed all day long. and thats what i did. with the rain. and that bloody bolt of thunder which made me jump. i guess our tear ducts are more active on rainy days. and so i cried along with the rain. and amidst the sniffing and sighing, i managed a smile or two. this has gotta stop im freakin myself out.

that feeling, its not sth everyone can feel i suppose. i wouldnt say im one of the 'lucky ones' cos trust me you feel rotten. its so see-sawish if you get what i mean. one min ure up, the other min ure down. hahaha.

i dont think things are up to me now. i dont think i have the final say. wait, do i even HAVE to say sth. oh well, follow your heart. i guess its the most truthful guide. i daresay i'l be fine if i were to lose you. this is life, isnt it?

one. d
two. snaps
three. xring then
four. xring always
five. elt.

12345 a palm . a slap. OWCH.

you only know the importance of a person when ure about to lose em. its okay. i'l take things in my stride. why think about stuffs that you have absolutely no control over? hey! i think ive grown taller in many ways. hahaha. il take this thing cool and easy. oh yes, and with a smile. theres always the happy memories, right? I STILL LOVE YOU ! coughs. and im sick ): mommys gonna skin me alive.

hi stranger.

strangely im feeling moody. i dont know, i feel sick. although i had a great day. caught a great movie. She's The Man. please go watch. inspired by shakespeare's Twelfth Night which happens to be my lit. text. WOOHOO. (:

oh well, i'l make this a short one cos ive got nth to say. i feel sick. but im happy about that. cos ive been waiting for a looong time. im weird, i know.

its been eight days. i dont know man. i really dont know. i wouldnt be surprised if... if. okay nevermind. im beginning to lose trust. in myself. simple questions usually get no answers. but i dont usually go by the rules (:

WTH AM I TALKING ABOUT? i dont know. my head hurts. wish you were here. nonono, wake up. hahaha. oh well, im sucha horny bastard. so sue me. PEACE.

everyones talking about it. WORLD CUP 06' englandparaguay in fifteen min time. id rather hang out with you guys ): oh well, some people say im flirtatious. really? id prefer to call it interactive. :D

fmy brain feels burnt. ive been thinking about lots of stuffs lately. and i realised how small my brain is. there are lots of questions. unavoidable questions. many what ifs. i dont like answering 'what if' questions. i prefer running away from them. but perhaps this time i should just face them. otherwise im never gonna get what i want. or maybe, what i think i want.


where are you. hahaha i miss you! :D

hi blog ure becoming sucha stranger.

sea breeze but my face is flushed. WHATS WRONG? i think its just the hearyourvoice virus :D

tease tease tease tease. thats how my day has been. its alright. i'l try to get used to it. SIS IN LAW! HAHAHA. fukin hilarious. good night people. its time for my soccer match.

hahaha. sis in law. hahaha